Myself - Chapter 3 - Part XIX

The next morning, the three of us went out to Helen’s house. Helen didn’t know yet that there were three of us, so I was going to knock on the door alone, then introduce Bugsy, then Emily, both of whom would be hiding at first.

The concept of there being three of me wouldn’t be totally new to Helen; there were two of her. She had an identical twin named Shasta. I suspected that they shared mannerisms not due to similarities in personalities, but simply to confuse people. If nothing else, I hoped that they would provide some insight on my situation.

Bugs and Em hid behind a shrub. I walked up to the door and rang the bell. Helen opened the door.

“Hi, Bernie!”

“Hello, Helen.” I noted the alliteration.

“Come on in.”

“Actually,” I said, “there’s something I want to discuss before I come in.”

“Oh?”

“I’m actually here for a reason.”

“Coming to have a nice chat with me isn’t a reason?”

“Well, this time it’s out of necessity.”

“It’s always out of necessity. I find people generally can’t go three weeks without talking to me before they start going batty.”

I gave her a cockeyed look. “Let’s get down to business here. The other morning, I woke up, and there were two of me.”

It took a couple of seconds for her to digest that. “Two of you?”

“Two of me.”

“Funny, same thing happened to me this morning.”

“I’m not joking with you here.”

“Just like that? Poof! Two of you?”

“You read that Kafka book. You know how he wakes up a bug? I woke up doubled.”

She paused before she spoke. “Bernie, I thought you didn’t do the funny stuff.”

I rolled my eyes in exasperation. “No, really. He’s over there.” As I pointed at the shrub, Bugsy came out and walked over.

“Oh my goodness,” Helen said, putting her hand over her mouth. “That’s bizarre.”

“Tell me about it,” I said.

“Pleasure to meet you, ma’am,” Bugsy said while pantomiming taking his hat off.