Myself - Chapter two - (Part X)
It was established that I would be the one to visit the dentist. Additionally, a ‘jump ball’ system was established. Every time one of these events was to occur, the possession arrow would flip, and it would be the other Bernie’s turn.
There were two distinct sets of issues at hand. There were the practical issues—where the second me would sleep, who would go to the dentist and what would happen to the other’s teeth, who would get married, et cetera. The other issues were social—most prominently, could I be my own best friend?
No one shared my interests the way I did. Bugsy ensured that for anything I ever wanted to do, there would be someone to do it with me. If I ever wanted to go for a random drive, or play a random game of monopoly, there would be someone around to do these things with. But it seemed both cheap and unfulfilling. When I was going to be doing something with Bugsy, I wouldn’t be sharing a moment with a friend—I was going to be sharing it with myself. Or maybe I was wrong. Maybe this was the most perfect best friend possible. I attempted small talk.
“So, how about those Phillies?”
“They stink.”
“Yeah.”
“Can’t win.”
“They don’t have that winning attitude.”
“Or starting pitching.”
“Who’s going to win the World Series with Cory Lidle?”
“Nobody, that’s who.”
I wasn’t quite sure what we had just accomplished. But something did suddenly occur to me. I started singing.
“I am the captain of the Pinafore!”
“And a right good captain too!”
“You’re very very good, and be it understood, I command a right good crew.”
“We’re very very good, and be it understood, he commands a right good crew.”
“Though related to a peer, I can hand, reef, and steer, and ship a selvagee; I am never known to quail at the fury of a gale, and I'm never, never sick at sea!”
“What never?”
“No, never!”
“What never?
“Hardy ever!”
“He's hardly ever sick at sea! Then give three cheers, and one cheer more, for the hardy Captain of the Pinafore! Then give three cheers, and one cheer more, for the Captain of the Pinafore!”
“You realize,” I said, “that now we can sing in two part harmony?”
“Are you dreaming?” I responded, off key.
7 Comments:
HAHA! That was the cutest segment yet. Reminds me of Michael's Clams. Also, about time you got some self-to-self dialogue in there! Seeing as dialogue is one of your strengths, I mean, that you have not really employed in this story so far.
okay now its getting a little weird... keep it coming!
NOW it's getting weird???
I feel a big fight scene coming on!
By weird I mean before it was like a spooky murder mystery kinda thing like a drama, now it all like happy go lucky, la di frinken da. When is he going to try and kill the other one, I mean, there cannot be more than one Bernie. One is plenty enough, and now two, its like a Hoagie's class on divison gone all wrong! (wow! that was like an Ethan comment- I should punish myself - I'll go to my corner)
You want me to kill off my own character???
I think we all know the answer to that queation.
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