Myself (Part IV)

When the train pulled into the station, I walked out and stood on the busy platform. I waited for myself to come and meet me. I stood on my toes and scanned the crowd. I was nowhere in sight. I had gotten lost in the crowd. This was not unlike me. It didn’t matter how well I knew the station; if there are enough people, I get easily disoriented. I waited for a good fifteen minutes, but I never arrived.

I thought about going back home, but I decided instead to go to the home of my good friend Charlie. He was another train ride away. I took a look at the platform floor, which was slowly emptying out. There were a bunch of used tickets, and I started going through them. I felt like a gambler looking through tossed racing forms. After a couple minutes fielding looks from disgusted passersby, I struck pay dirt in the form of an unpunched ticket.

As I walked to the platform of the train I wanted, it occurred to me that I might be being followed. I didn’t see anything to indicate this, but logic dictated that I was going to do whatever I was going to do. If I was going to run off to Charlie’s, most likely, so would I. This was going to be interesting. I looked all around. No sign of me.

I waited ten more minutes for the train. I spent the whole time keeping an eye out for me but I was nowhere to be found. When the train came, I made sure I was the last person to board, and I looked at everyone boarding before me to see if any of them were me.

After I got on the train and took my seat, I began thinking about all the questions the day’s events raised. How did there become two of me? How long has the other me existed? Has the other me done anything in my name? Why was I attempting to abduct myself? Why was I behaving in this manner in which I would never behave? Was I dangerous? Should I contact the police?

I decided to forgo the metaphysical questions. There was no way to go about considering them. So I moved on to the practical ones. The most pressing issue was that of why I was different than myself. And I could not figure out why. I thought to myself, under what conditions would I abduct myself? Maybe I was playing a joke on myself. What better way to introduce myself to myself than an elaborate practical joke? Except, it wasn’t funny. So this was a definite possibility.